Too aggressive, too strong-willed, too competitive, too independent, too slender, too much dark beauty, too girl next-door, too mysterious, too closed off, too sharp, too pained. Could you really be too much of anything? The simple answer here was ‘yes’. I know. Because I am all of these things. Some I hide well from prying eyes, some qualities people don’t want to see, some qualities I don’t care if people see. That nice, naïve, beautiful girl you’re looking for doesn’t exist here. Sometimes I have to wonder if she ever did, but then I find myself needing to ask someone who knew me all those years ago, 'did that person ever exist?' I immediately stop questioning it. They wouldn’t know. *** Sleep hadn’t come. I didn’t expect it to and if I’m honest I didn’t want it to. Instead I laid in the small bed, big enough to only fit one person comfortably but was instead holding two naked bodies. My eyes closed and my breathing slow, letting the few hours before sunrise melt into the ab
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